How to Engage Your Children in Chores Around Your Home
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Post by Thenedra Roots for Maple
When I was growing up, chores were always punitive. If I misbehaved, then I was given a long list of things to do around the house as a consequence, however it was never an effective way to have me engaged in household duties. Now that I’m raising my own children, I want their engagement in chores to be just as normalized as them brushing their teeth everyday. I want my children to partake in chores as part of their routine and something that they are (mostly) willing to do.
One thing that I began doing early with my sons, is allowing them in spaces that I was in. For example, when I’m in the kitchen, so are they. They can see that I am unloading the dishwasher and they’re either playing alongside me or they’re emptying out the silverware, but either way I’m letting them know that it’s normal for them to be with me in the kitchen. This might feel annoying and like more work, but what you’re really doing is allowing for exploration and letting them “help”, even if it means forks and spoons on the floor. This is something that you can let your child engage in as soon as they’re able to pull themselves up.
Another way to engage toddler-aged children is letting them fold washcloths or hand towels, because they’re small enough to not overwhelm them but big enough to actually fold. Folding towels is great for fine and gross motor skills and hand-eye coordination. I will ask my sons whether we should fold it into a square or rectangle and also ask them how high they can pile the towels before they topple over.
Lastly, try to prevent yourself from wanting to reward your child with money for doing chores. For one, most parents are not rewarding their children for taking a shower or brushing their teeth. These are things we have to do to maintain hygiene and wellness, similar to our homes we have to maintain the hygiene of our space. Another reason is because it creates the expectation that the only way our children are responsible for their space is if we are paying them. In reality, they should be paying us, given they’re the mess makers!
Whether it is every Sunday morning or a little bit everyday, having your children be part of chores will not only save you some struggles in the future, but it’ll surprise you of how capable they really are of helping out. I think we often assume that our children are too small to help, but given the chance they are little rockstars!
